


La Question C'est Voulez-Vous

by Thedupshadove



Category: Good Omens (Radio), Good Omens (TV), Good Omens (stage Musical), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Emotions, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:26:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23892301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thedupshadove/pseuds/Thedupshadove
Summary: Sometimes, the unspoken needs to be said.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	La Question C'est Voulez-Vous

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve got all four versions swirling in my mind right now, so this can be read as whichever one you like, except we’re assuming that the backstory shown in “Hard Times” happened. But then again, there isn’t much of anything in any other version to suggest that all that stuff _can’t_ have happened.

“Crowley...have I ever apologized?”

The pleasantly musty air of the bookshop stirs as Crowley looks up and across at the angel. “For what?”

“For all those years of making you the guilty one.”

Crowley knits his brow in confusion, “You mean like wanting me to be the one to kill the Antichrist?”

“Well, I suppose that was part and parcel of the same thing, but no. I mean I’m sorry for making it your fault that I wanted you.”

“Come again?”

Aziraphale sighed. “Well you have to understand, I was still very much buying into the party line, so to speak, about demons. And about sexuality in general, for that matter. I was convinced that I’d Fall if I let myself so much as think to fondly of you, let alone admit to myself that I wanted you in that way. So I did my best to convince myself that you were deliberately trying to tempt me.”

Crowley nodded.

“I wasn’t angry with you, you understand!” Aziraphale added hastily, “I tried to tell myself that you were probably doing what would be considered your job—tempting anybody you got close to, particularly an angel. And that I wasn’t to blame you, but should just do my best to keep myself from falling for it, so to speak.”

“Hmm.”

“But then over time we got closer anyway, and I came to realize that you couldn’t really be trying to tempt me into any indiscretion, let alone into Falling. Not with the way you always seemed to pull back every time you most had me in the palm of your hand. So surely I should have abandoned the idea that you were some scheming seducer. But by then...”

“Yeah?”

“By then I was more than merely charmed. I _wanted_ you, Crowley. I wanted so _much_ , but I wasn’t _supposed_ to, so this, this... _image_ of the suave demon plotting the despoilment of an angel...it let me fantasize, but keep myself innocent. It let me have my cake and eat it too.”

“And we all know how much you like cake.”

“Oh, droll. But I’m serious. I concocted all these elaborate fantasies of you catching me. Ravishing me. Sometimes...sometimes I would imagine you would use that famous demonic hypnotism you’re so good at on me.”

“Ngk.”

“But it made me treat you horribly! We were supposed to be friends, and I was still on some level thinking of you as a corrupter, as an enemy, as something dangerous. I was ushering you into my shop and all the while calling you a ‘foul fiend’! How must that have made you feel?”

Crowley’s eyes had gone strange and soft. “I understood. Mostly.”

Aziraphale smiled. “Well, that’s a relief. But still, I want to take a moment to clear away any stigmata of misunderstanding,” he reached out and took Crowley’s hands in his. “I love you. And I want you. And that is _not_ because you have tricked or trapped me into it; it is because you are appealing and lovable. You make my life immeasurably more rich, both as my friend and my lover. And I am the luckiest angel in the world to have you by my side.”

It was nearly a full minute before Crowley could respond. “That’s...not exactly a big category, is it?”

“Oh, your endless flip. Now come here.”

So Crowley moved across to the couch, settled his head back onto Aziraphale’s chest, and tried not to let tears join with his smile as the angel began to play idly with his hair.

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the convergence of several things.
> 
> 1\. The fact that Aziraphale’s attraction to Crowley is considered “forbidden” and “wrong” by his community, thus adding to the queer subtext even though the fact that they both appear to be men isn’t the main reason it’s forbidden.
> 
> 2\. The common practice, by those experiencing “forbidden” attraction, of creating fantasies where, physically or mentally, your consent is removed, thus making the resultant encounter “not your fault” even though it’s something that you wished for.
> 
> 3\. The way that, especially in the show, this supposed Soft Angel will often say things to Crowley that on the face of them are just...mean. But they don’t seem to be meant to hurt so much as they seem like a barrier Aziraphale puts up to keep himself “safe”.
> 
> 4\. Let Crowley be openly loved!


End file.
